What does Tottenham joining a European super league feels like? "That's OK," replied the priest "I got him with the door." Shall I call your wife for you?" What have Tottenham won??? It was the moment that was supposed to herald a new era of success for the club under head coach Juande . The priest climbed into the passenger seat, and they continued down the road. Arsenal currently sit above seventh-placed Spurs in the Premier League table on goal difference, though Tottenham do have a game in hand over Mikel Arteta's men. Q: Why do Tottenham fans suck at geometry? The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. I set my XBOX password to "Tottenhams Defense". Of course, this wasn't the. Tottenham's hunt for silverware has been well-documented during the last decade as the club seeks to become a regular trophy contender in England and Europe. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. And they only scored at the very very end, said the teammates.Maradonna says, No, No, I have, Ive let you down! now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Diego Maradona decides to come out of retirement and play for West Ham.He goes into the changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. Love my club. 173. 40 FC Barcelona Jokes You Cannot Share With A Cule, 80 Football World Cup 2022 Jokes To Cheer Soccer Fans, 50 Funny Arsenal Jokes You Shouldnt Tell A Gunner. A: You paint Red Devils on his dick and he won't beat it for 4 years! The Ultimate Trivia Battle! Reckless Driver Spurs drew 1-1 at the Emirates before the decisive second leg, a 5-1 victory which sent them through 6-2 on aggregate. All my life I always heard the joke that Spurs never won a trophy so I assumed that was just fact. He takes them before anyone notices.Nails always come in handy. One day while driving along, he saw a priest. Why did Antonio Conte buy his team all lighters?Because they kept losing all their matches. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. The former Tottenham chairman made a clever jibe following a task in which the contestants had to interior decorate a hotel room at the lavish Stoke Park Hotel. Have something to tell us about this article? Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. Q: What's the difference between a line of cocaine and a pair of Tottenham Hotspur tickets? Career Day How do you know Antonio Conte must have hurt his leg whilst at Tottenham Hotspur?He is always relying on Son and Kane. The Lilywhites launched a Premier League title bid in 2015-16 and spent most of the season as frontrunners, but ultimately conceded the league to champions Leicester City. The Percy family owned land in the Tottenham area. 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The most recent trophy the club has won is the League Cup in 2008 (Carling Cup, later to be called Carabao Cup), beating Chelsea 2-1 in the final after extra time. Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? Tottenham trophies won: When did Spurs last lift silverware. Spurs supporters were left annoyed over the message, as they insisted that it was an unnecessary cheap shot. The north London side . The. A: The bucket. Still, modern silverware has eluded them as the club continues to forage for a major title. You have a gun with two bullets. "Oh yes, I've found your details" says the receptionist "but I see you're going to need help. , Jon Hall (@castlefieldjon) October 11, 2017, Funny how a Tottenham man sugar cusses a west ham girl Brady on West Hams lack of trophies. However, for Mourinho the "half" came in April when Mourinho was fired by Spurs less than a week before they . I dont do it frequently, but once in a while, I like to call down to Earth and check if any of the people have any questions for me. Whats so special about Spurs from all other EPL clubs?They are a social experiment set up to see how far they can mentally and physically push a human being. , to which God replied, In ten years. The disappointed admirer sulks away, exclaiming, Thats a shame; Ill probably be dead by then.The Arsenal fan and his walking cane push the first fan to the side as he sulks. On February 24, 2008, Tottenham lifted the League Cup to end their nine-year trophy drought. TOTTENHAM supporters are rejoicing after ending their trophy drought with victory in the Walter Tull Memorial Cup. ", Feeling the need to point out their trophies won, this fan messaged: "Last time I checked, 3 European Trophies, 2 League Titles, 8 FA Cups, 4 League Cups.". He would swerve his van as if to hit them, then swerve back just missing them. For Team which is top 6 I think it is far to say the lack of silverware is a concern when it happens year after year. The Ultimate Trivia Battle! In the run-up to the final, Spurs topped Middlesbrough, Blackpool, and Manchester City all by 2-0 scorelines. Another saw Dulux asked if the firm's iconic Old English Sheepdog mascot could play at centre-back, with the response offered: "He might do a better job.". The new Spurs Shop at the Tottenham Experience the largest retail space of any football club in Europe will be officially open from 10am tomorrow (Tuesday). They beat the likes of Petr Cech, Didier Drogba, and Frank Lampard who all started the game for Chelsea. Spurs finally win a trophy. 66/67. They have only lost once, in 1987, while winning the competition the other eight times they reached the final. 91/92. The teacher is shocked, and she calls for an early recess for the rest of the class. Juande Ramos' Tottenham team beat crosstown rivals Arsenal6-2 in the semi-final, earning them a clash against the Blues. Spurs have gone 13 years without landing major silverware, andhope Jose Mourinho will bring that barren run to a close in 2021with theCarabao Cup final with Manchester City on April 25. "Well, My Dad and Mom are Liverpool supporters, and I'm a Liverpool fan, too!" not knowing where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors but still didn't see anything. ", to which God replies, "It's a shame because I'll most likely be dead by then." Recommended: Arsenal Jokes At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. Oh because Spurs have won loads recently..oh dear not a great gag, Ian Abrahams (Moose) (@BroadcastMoose) October 11, 2017, What a wanker @Lord_Sugar having a laugh about West Ham trophy cabinet! Having given themselves a shot at glory in this season's League Cup, Tottenham will be looking to recpature the last prize that they claimed. Spurs haven't won the top-flight league title since 1961, and have won just one trophy a League Cup in 2008 since 1991. Spurs announced the opening of what they boasted was the largest club shop in Europe, which teed up these Gooners nicely to mock their bitter north London rivals. Tottenham won an FA Cup back in 1991, topping Roy Keane and Nottingham Forest in the final 2-1, and also in extra time. What did the guy do when a kinky girl asked him to humiliate her?He bought her a Tottenham shirt. Tottenham's last trophy was the 2008 Carling Cup, when they beat Chelsea 2-1 in the final at Wembley. You guys are awesome :) Open for links FACEBOOK: https://www.faceb. You can ask questions concerning the past, present, or future, whatever you want to know, but you only get one question per person for the sake of time.The Manchester United supporter pushes the other two aside and exclaims, God! Spurs now need to get positive results on the pitch, win trophies and regularly play in the Champions League. Notable names in the Spurs lineup forthat match included Jermaine Jenas and Robbie Keane, with Ledley King as captain and England international Paul Robinson in goal. The 2008 Carling Cup final was the first League Cup final to be played at the newly-built Wembley Stadium, with the previous finals held at Cardiff's Millennium Stadium. Trophy No. Q: Did you hear that Tottenham Hotspur doesn't have a website? Little Johnny is last, and finally the teacher calls on him to talk about his dad. Your email address will not be published. Q: Why are Tottenham strikers like grizzly bears? Enter your account data and we will send you a link to reset your password. And the goal of any competition is to win it. Which didn't go down well with his 'advisor' Karren Brady. In fact, Tottenham has had a number of close calls recently, losing in the EFL Cup final three times since last hoisting the trophy in 2008. For now, they remain a figure of fun to some, with Dulux opting to indulge in some ill-advised banter with fans on social media after agreeing to become an official supplier to the north London giants. The Arsenal supporter prays to God, When will Arsenal win the Premier League again? , to which God replies, In 20 years. The admirer, like the first, is visibly upset, saying, Thats a shame, Ill probably be dead by then.God then turns his attention to the last man, asking, And what of you, my son? What exactly is your question? Alan Sugar having a pop about West Ham's trophy cabinet! Spurs fans have been made to wait a while since their last trophy, but when was the last time that they enjoyed lifting a piece of silverware? Q: What do you call 5 Tottenham fans standing ear to ear? The paint suppliers jokingly responded to number of comments on social media - before hastily deleting the posts. "Why do I need help?" I love it, this from the official website. A: The baby will stop whining after awhile. Whats the difference between a Tottenham fan and a broken clock?Even a broken clock is right twice a day! There's nothing worth craping on! He wants us to win the European Trophy, the dogs owner replies.The pub owner then asked what the dog says when Tottenham wins an away European match, to which the man replied, I dont know. How Tottenhams Kane, Son, and Lloris voted in the FIFA Football Awards 2022, Report: Bryan Gil could be marked by former Spurs teammate this weekend, Report: Everything indicates that 26-year-old will leave Spurs in summer Valued at 20.7m, Harry Kane explains what Spurs teammates have spoken about a lot recently, Report: Spurs expected to start talks with Barcelona for player in coming days. ", Another said: "The fact Arsenal have to put that on their website shows how threatened they are of us nowadays. She sits down with Johnny and asks him if this is really true about his dad. It said it was to weak. They might actually be one of the few clubs in the Prem owned by a British entity. What two Tottenham players make a Liverpool goalie?Alli-Son Becker. The football results are coming up on the television in the corner, Sporting CP 2, Tottenham Hotspur 0, reads the announcer in his normal, rather sedate, voice.Suddenly the Jack Russell dog jumps up and shouts out, Oh, no, not again.The shocked pub owner says, Thats amazing. Former Tottenham striker and Match of the Day presenter Lineker has joked about the news. Q: What is the difference between Tottenham Hotspur and a cup of tea? Tottenham are being brutally trolled online after releasing a season review DVD of the 2016/17 campaign - despite failing to win a single trophy - or even reach a cup final. In the FA Cup, Spurs have been wildly successful when reaching the final. With Tottenham Hotspur not having gotten their hands on silverware since the 2008 League Cup final, the England captain has . Tottenham last won a major trophy in 2007-08 when they clinched the Football League Cup. Arsenal beating Everton to Gabriel proving vital, Liverpool need midfielders - but they need a new Van Dijk too, Five things Xavi must do to avoid another Barca crisis. When another pointed out that Tottenham can keep any paint supplies in said cabinet because they "don't seem to put anything else in there", Dulux responded again by saying: "Don't be silly, surfaces should be dust free before painting. Terry Venables was in charge and chose Gary Lineker to startfor Spurs up front, but the winner came via an own-goal as Des Walker put the ball in his own net. The Gunners have left supporters in shock for mocking their North London rivals over their lack of silverware through their online shop. That 2008 League Cup is taking up a lot room in Tottenhams.#TheApprentice, James Sharpe (@TheSharpeEnd) October 11, 2017. 67/68. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? Photo by Chris Brunskill/Fantasista/Getty Images. Prior to the 2007/08 EFL Cup victory, Spurs collected a number of competition victories under its belt, but most of them came a while back. And yep according to their Wikipedia; Spurs have won twoleague titles, eight FA Cups, fourLeague Cups, sevenFA Community Shields, oneEuropean Cup Winners' Cupand twoUEFA Cups. West Hams trophy room has got more in it, says @Lord_Sugar. SW1882 Ltd - Suite 8 Homes House, 253 Cowbridge Road West, Cardiff, Wales, CF5 5TD 98/99. 99/00. The Englishman has joked that Spurs have now finally won a trophy. Lots of effort and history has made the space. "That's no reason," she says loudly. Tottenham announced the opening of what they boasted was the largest club shop in Europe, which teed up these Gooners nicely to mock their bitter north London rivals Jump directly to the content Browse and manage your votes from your Member Profile Page, Your email address will not be published. The north Londoners cameclose to silverware again in 2019, when they reached the Champions League final in Madrid against Premier League rivals Liverpool, but ultimately lost 2-0. You wont get hit unless the bottles got your name on it., Thats just what Im worried about, said the fan,my names Johnny Walker.. ? Result from The London Stadium: West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) Tottenham Hotspur 1 (Kane 89 minutes). They cant believe it, he has single-handedly got a draw against Spurs!They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. 'JOKE': Injured Chelsea defender Thiago Silva becomes latest star to hit out at FIFA's Best awards as the 38-year-old appears to make dig at Julian Alvarez finishing above Kevin De Bruyne and . Q: What is the difference between a Tottenham supporter and a baby? Q: What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet? Tottenham's partnership with Dulux has not got off to the best of starts, with the paint company mocking the Premier League club over their empty trophy cabinet within minutes of a deal being announced. A Primary school teacher explains to her class that she is a Tottenham Hotspur supporter. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Not really knowing what a Tottenham Hotspur supporter was, but wanting to be like their teacher, hands explode into the air. A: Kick his sister in the mouth . Q: What is the shortest book in the world called? A pause, and a smile. A: Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. A: The accused. A Liverpool fan liked to amuse himself by scaring every Hotspur supporter he saw strutting down the street in an obnoxious Tottenham jersey. Why did he say that when the result was announced that Tottenham lost?Because hes a Spurs supporter. Mauricio Pochettino jokes 'finally I got a trophy' as he receives Manager of the Year at London Football Awards. A: Dress her in an Arsenal jersey! What if Tottenham was a Game Thrones house?Their motto would be False hope is better than no hope.. Up to $10 000 in daily prizes, hope Jose Mourinho will bring that barren run to a close in 2021, Five reasons why Man Utd can win a quadruple , Pepe's best assist? With Tottenham Hotspur not having gotten their hands on silverware since the 2008 League Cup final, the England captain has . Why cant Tottenham open up a restaurant?Because they have no silverware. Were totally in their heads rent free. A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. This service is provided on News Group Newspapers' Limited's Standard Terms and Conditions in accordance with our Privacy & Cookie Policy. "What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron, What would you be then?" 70/71. English Supercup Winner. Q: What does a fine wine and Tottenham Hotspur have in common? "Tottenham Hotspur's Trophy Cabinet. A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while! Q: What's the difference between Tottenham supporters and mosquitoes? James Walker (@w88lks1980) October 11, 2017, @Lord_Sugar behave, no need for the #WestHam abuse #COYI, Joe Robinson (@RealJoeRobinson) October 11, 2017, @Lord_Sugar West Ham's trophy cabinet may be more sparse than your glamorous Spurs space. Q: What does a Spurs fan do when his team has won the Champions League? What do you call a Tottenham Hotspur supporter who scores high on IQ tests?A cheat. Most recently, Spurs fell to Manchester City in the . To my surprised my dad corrected me saying they won the fa Cup and the league Cup before. Vetere angered Tottenham's senior officials by revealing some of the club's transfer targets in a television interview while on a scouting mission in Colombia, according to the Daily Mail. A: Because all the cups are in Manchester. FA Cup Winner. Speaking before AC Milan's return leg in the last-16 Champions League tie against Tottenham in London, he added: 'I don't like the weather there. Since that breakthrough, Spurs have finished no lower than seventh place in the Premier League. When will Manchester United win the Premier League again? TIL the original World Cup trophy survived WWII in Italy hidden in a shoebox under the FIFA VP's bedonly to be stolen in 1966 from England, held for ransom, recovered, stolen again in 1983 from Brazil, and never found again. I went shopping the first time I went to London.' No sooner had Tottenham announced the opening of their brand spanking new megastore, Arsenal fans were on them. "Yes" replies Emmanuel "you should have my details on your computer". The teacher is now angry. What do you call a dead Tottenham Fan in a closet?Last years winner of the hide and seek contest. Spursalso lost in the 2015 edition, and in the 2009 final. The stadium is the biggest club ground in London and is a marvel to behold. Despite the goalscoring prowess of striker Harry Kane, who has won two Premier League Golden Boots, he has yet to lift a trophy with Tottenham. Q: You're trapped in a room with a Lion, Cobra snake and an Tottenham Hotspur Fan.